Sunday Chronicles: Saying No

Investment Piece, Sunday Chronicles, saying no, fashion blogger, CA, TX

A few years ago, in my acting career, I was debating whether or not to take a part that I had been offered. I had just completed a role similar to the one on the table, and the new role didn’t feel right. However, as a creative, I was deathly afraid to say no to any job; I was scared that the opportunity would never come back around. My manager at the time sat me down and told me a truth, “Your life and career are shaped by not only what you do, but what you say no to”. While this was great advice at the time-the part was truly not right for me-but this advice on saying no has been a game changer for me.

Loves, in all honesty, saying no is not something that comes easily to me. There’s still a part of me that fears that if I say no to one opprotunity that it will not be replaced by another. I also hate letting people down and sometimes feel pressure to do things for others. I don’t always say no gracefully,saying no is not a skill that I’ve mastered. However, beyond realizing that our lives can be shaped by what we say no to, the other light bulb moment for me was realizing that Saying to one thing may mean saying yes to what you really want. Because loves, we only have so much and if we spend our time avoiding saying no, we only end up saying no to what we really want.

It’s true in all areas.
Want steak for lunch? You can’t order pizza.
Want to date Bob? You can’t keep saying yes to Ted.
Want to own a Gucci store? You can’t sell Hanes t-shirts.
And loves, in all cases there’s nothing wrong with either choice, but if saying yes to what we don’t want leaves us saying no to what we really want–let’s make sure we’re saying no, or yes, to the right things. Ok. So how? Well, I’m working on it, but this is what I’m learning so far:

Be Clear About What You Want
Vision, planning, goals, whatever you call it, you have to know what you want to get it. And yes, over time this might change, but think long and hard about what you really want. Be specific. When you know exactly what you want/love/need, it’s a bit easier to say yes or no to opprotunities accordingly.

Take Time
I have a bad habit of thinking that I need to reply to every request in a timely manner. And, yes, that’s polite and sometimes needed. However, there’s no need to rush an answer; when I do I often end up saying yes when I mean no–and loves, let’s be honest, that never ends well for anyone. I think it’s ok to take a minute to really think things through and decide what’s best for you. Worried about the person on the other end of the request? Let them know you need some time to think things over, set a time to decide; and if they aren’t ok with that, it may inform your answer.

What’s Meant For You Won’t Pass You By
I’ve been a creative my entire life; and I still worry about opprotunies coming, coming back, what I’m doing with my life. And while those may be worth while trains of thought–they aren’t always productive. A mentor of mine is adamant that what’s for you won’t pass you by, that if you’re working towards what you want, things will happen for you. This can be hard to trust, but I find when I can, it works. Chances can be like exes–they always come back. So work hard, say no to what you have to, and trust your opprotunies will come around for you.

How do you say no? Any tips for me?

Wishing us all a week of the right yeses and amazing shoes! XO RA

Morgan Le Fay

Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, Morgan Le Fay, cream, magic, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, Morgan Le Fay, cream, magic, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, Morgan Le Fay, cream, magic, Ca, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, Morgan Le Fay, cream, magic, Ca, TX Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, Morgan Le Fay, cream, magic, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, Morgan Le Fay, cream, magic, CA, TX

Loves, you know I love fashion that is fun and elegant, juxatipositons, and telling you about designers/companies. This dream of a dress fits all three. I love the cream that lends itself to formal events (yes, you could get married in this), but the edge of the tulle. I love that it is a stand out piece, yet you could change it’s personality with accersories (guess who wants to wear it with her lion belt (seen here) and socks with peep toes). Most of all, I love this designer. This dress is a Morgan Le Fay. I fell in love with her work a few years ago when I saw an editorial which featured a feathered maxi skirt by the house. As I started to research and follow the brand, I knew we were meant to be. The collections are a mix of fresh details and elegant pieces. And it’s named after something magical? Count me in!
More about the brand:
Named after the powerful sorceress in the tales of King Arthur, Morgane Le Fay has become a bride-to-be favorite thanks to its bewitchingly beautiful wedding dresses and bridesmaid gowns. Founded in 1982, Morgane Le Fay operates out of a studio in Soho — drawing inspiration from the history and ambiance of Lower Manhattan in designing its bridal collections, perfume and ready-to-wear women’s clothing. The brand’s design philosophy is to craft clothing for fit, ease and elegance — not for age or background. The result is an airy, sophisticated style that has attracted the likes of Bjork, Juliette Binoche, Brooke Shields and the staff at Martha Stewart Weddings. (Sourced from Gilt)

You can shop the brand directly online here, or at their stores in Santa Monica or Soho. I was lucky enough to find this dream of a dress on Vestaire, and I know a good search can result in finding MLF pieces on various sites.

I hope you love it as much as I do–and might I recommend wearing it in a magical place?

Happy Friday! XO RA

Shop some of my picks below:

90% off luxury consignment

Spring Trends

Loves, winter is beginning to get on its way out, and spring is beginning to sneak it’s way in. This can mean many things, but for us: it means it’s shopping time! Below are my favorite Spring Trends, looks I love, can’t wait to try, or am already rocking. I would love to know: what Spring Trends are you looking forward to? What are you buying?

XO RA

Corset Belts
Investment Piece, fashion, style, blogger, nip slip, high fashion, humor, CA, TX

Corset belts are coming in all shapes, textures, and fastenings. Attached to tops, leather, knit, tie up, zip back. They all look great with dresses, pants, any top, over suits, and jackets–anything that needs a little pop.

Pictured: This vintage Fendi one I found on Vestaire Collective and featured here

Sheer
Investment Piece, spring trends, sheer, is sheer a thing we're doing, fashion blogger, high fashion, CA, TX

Dresses, Tops, Skirts–everything is springing sheer in this Spring Trend. And loves, as this pic from one of my very first posts shows, I’m in. On the runways there were a lot of nipples, and while I’m not shy about that, if too sheer isn’t for you, sheer is great over vintage lingerie, lingerie, tanks, shorts, etc. Either way it’s a great layering piece, piece on its own, and I love the colors and patterns!

TBT to my sheer post here

Pink and Purple
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, color block, Red//Pink, Jcrew, Zara, Gucci, CA, TX

We all know that I’m all in on the hot pink offerings. And I’m in love with the neon lilac and lilac hues that are popping up. It’s pastel, but with a kick. And the best thing? They’re almost neutral, which means they go with everything.

I have some lilac coming for you, relive my love of Pink here

Florals
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, florals, trends, CA, TX
I don’t see a future where this gif won’t be funny. But, yes loves, spring trends means florals. Not a surprise, but your outfit can be. I love florals mixed with gingham (a trend and a neutral all at the same time), the bright florals, the dark florals. Don’t be afraid to mix with colors, and try new versions of it!

Where are you shopping these trends and how are you styling them?

Happy Women’s Day!

Loves, it’s International Women’s Day! And I hope that today is one where you get pampered and appreciated if you’re a woman; and man or woman that you let the women in your life know that you appreciate them. However you spend the day, I hope you take a moment to realize how much the women in our lives add to society.

This video I made to celebrate the day includes posts from:
Lady in Red
#red
Floral+Gucci
PjDressing
Chanel Heat

I’ve pulled some of my fave red looks to shop below:

Happy Women’s Day ! XO RA

Fast Fashion

Investment Piece, fashion, blogger, fast fashion, investment, Eco fashion, sustainability, CA, TX

Sometimes things keep coming at you, and force you to pay attention. I picked up this book, Waredrobe Crisis by Clare Press last year, and somehow it got moved to the bottom of my reading pile. This weekend several articles popped up in my social feeds about sustainable fashion (and of course I was a bad fashion blogger who didn’t save any and can’t find them now), and then this morning Emma Watson and her eco-friendly closet was on the Coveteur, here. So, sustainable fashion, and in particular fast fashion has been on my mind.

Some things to note: I have a thing for fast fashion. In particular, Zara. I just love them, and I’m sure you’ve noticed that a lot of my clothes come from them. I also love sustainable fashion (some faves: Reformation, both Zara and HM have Eco-friendly lines worth checking out, vintage (the ultimate recycling), and Stella McCartney). I care about the environment, about great clothes, and understand that we all want on trend pieces that are affordable. When we talk about sustainable fashion and fast fashion as entities seperate from “fashion”, I don’t know that it serves us, as it is all a part of what we are offered.

I think fast fashion, in particular, is a layered topic. The name itself suggests that “fast fashion” isn’t well made, and not “as good”; and while that can be the case, for my purposes, fast fashion to me means the methods of the making aren’t very environmentally friendly, and the clothes themselves are “fast”, meaning on trend, not meant to last long. Some fast fashion stores offer basics as well (again, I have Zara that’s become my staples), but the tying factor are the trendy pieces offered at a “cheaper” price. And loves, if you begin to google this topic you would be amazed at what can be considered fast fashion. Beyond the trends, some layers to the issue are price, niche, and availibity.

Again, we can’t be mad at anyone who wants to stay on trend and within their budget. And fast fashion affords many this opportunity. I vividly remember reading some fashion magazine when I was 23, and an editor mentioned her “throw away” clothes included pants that were $150. At 23 my entire clothing budget was $150. I was floored that it was cheap to someone. And loves, we need to reconginze that for many, spending 100s of dollars on every item isn’t a possibility. There is a gap in our fashion offerings–we have some at the top, some at the bottom, but the middle is thin–and even the middle is a price reach for some. I’d also argue, that if you have a limited budget your money should go towards basics, not trends; making that fast fashion trend market a niche. Also, there are stores who’s bed and butter are trends, they do them and they do them well. Add to that the fact that designer trends aren’t highly available, Prada doesn’t have a store on every corner; and many lines release limit quantities of pieces. So, there’s a huge hole for fast fashion to fill.

Yet.

As consumers, we should care about where our clothes come from, the working conditions of the manufacturers, what it does to our environment. How do we balance these two things?

This is where I tell you an honest truth. I don’t know. I think until the hole that fast fashion fills is fixed in some way, fast fashion isn’t going anywhere. And for all the reasons listed above, I get it. I’m part of it. But, I also think we have a chance to support businesses that are promoting sustainable fashion, and we should. From Reformation to Emma’s picks to eco-friendly dry cleaners, I think we should buy responsible clothes. I’m a huge fan of vintage for many reasons, but it helps that it is truly the ultimate form of recycling. I love sites like TheRealReal and Vestaire Collective that sell gently used clothing are fantastic and worthy of your business. And maybe the most radical thing we can do is include all fashion-sustainable, designer, fast, etc- into our “fashion discussions, hold the entire industry to high standards.

What do you think? Do you love fast fashion? Sustainable fashion? I’d love to know your thoughts on this issue and get recs for shopping!

XO RA

Denim Dress

Investment Piece, Stephen Spillman, fashion blogger, high fashion, black, denim dress, high boots, CA, TX
Investment Piece, Stephen Spillman, fashion blogger, high fashion, black, denim dress, ca, TX
Investment Piece, Stephen Spillman, high fashion, fashion blogger, black, denim dress, Ca, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, Stephen Spillman, high fashion, black, denim dress, Ca, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, Stephen Spillman, high fashion, black, denim dress, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, Stephen Spillman, high fashion, denim dress, CA, TX

Who says that basics need be basic? Take this denim dress: denim dresses are great, they go with everything, can be throw on and go, can be dressed up or down. My take? Make the denim black and add gold leather accents. Add high boots. Or heels. Watch the magic. This dress is a few years old, from Asos, but I love it! Everytime I put it on, it feels fresh. The slit, the pockets (front and back), and the color. It goes great with boots and sneakers; yet I’ve worn it to events with heels. It’s throw on and go, yet elevated: everything I love.

What kind of denim dresses do you love? How do you wear them?

XO RA

Shop my picks below!

Shoulder Ruffles

Investment Piece, Fashionblogger, high fashion, shoulder ruffles, stripes, stirrups, Stephen Spillman, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, shoulder Ruffles, stripes, stirrups, Stephen Spillman, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, shoulder Ruffles, Stephen Spillman, stripes, stirrups, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, shoulder Ruffles, stripes, white, CA, TX
Investment Piece, shoulder Ruffles, fashion blogger, high fashion, stripes, stirrups, CA, TX
Investment Piece, shoulder Ruffles, stripes, high fashion, Stephen Spillman, ca, TX

Know why one shoulder/off the shoulder/ cold shoulder silhouettes keep coming back? They’re fun, flattering and add a frill to everything. And shoulder ruffles? Loves, this top from Freya is just amazing. It’s great for twirling, goes amazing with stir-up pants (a throwback and modern all at once), and fits my fave statement belt like a boss. (Yes, belts are still my thing. Need more belts? Got it here) The white shoe is both fresh and a pop. And this background. There’s something magical about exploring and finding corners with both odes to surfing, love and pink lips. I can’t wait to wear this top with just about every thing I own (shoulder ruffles may be my next thing) and these pants look great with sweaters, sweatshirts, and tees. Trust me, these shoes and belt go with everything! I promise!

Happy Friday!
XO RA

SHOPBOP Sale

Investment Piece, fashion blogger, ShopBop, sale, CA, TX

Loves! It’s one of the best sales, ever! No expections, no limits, no rules. Buy what you love, as much as you love and save! Get my picks from ShopBop below–and happy shopping!

XO RA

WaterWorks

Investment Piece, waterworks, vintage, kenzo, high fashion, blogger, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion, kenzo, vintage, waterworks, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, high fashion,
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, water works, high fashion, kenzo,vintage, CA, TX
Investment Piece, waterworks, Fashionblogger, high fashion, kenzo, vintage, CA, TX
Investment Piece, fashion blogger, kenzo, vintage, high fashion, waterworks, CA, TX

Loves, you know that fantasy you have about running through waterfalls in an amazing vintage dress? I highly recommend loving them out. It’s worth the WaterWorks.

This vintage Kenzo (which I found on Etsy and came with the belt!) is straight out of my dream board for Spring. I love the green, the pink, and the details! So the shoulders are adjustable, the belt can be tied so many ways, and the deep neckline. It’s strong and romantic and fun, all at the same time.

And this backdrop? Is there anything more amazing than water? The steps down, the falling water, the sanctuary in the middle of the city. It was peaceful and wild all at the same time (and isn’t that the fun of fashion?).

So my vote for your Wednesday, or any day, take a dress (or pants or jeans or skirt or anything) you love, find some water, and make waterworks of your own!

XO RA

Shoes are from a few years ago, shop my picks below!

2/27 at 12 a.m. ET to 2/28 at 11:59 p.m. ET

Vintage Jewelry: Care and Cleaning

Investment Piece, fashion, blogger, vintage, belts, high fashion, necklaces, CA, TX

Loves, we’ve spent a month chatting about vintage jewelry. Brands I love (Monet), stores I love (Platt Boutique) and ways to wear vintage pieces Belts as necklaces). But now that we’ve been treated and have our vintage jewelry, how do we care for it? How do we clean it? Loves, I wouldn’t leave you hanging! Get my best tips for care and cleaning your vintage jewelry below!

Care
Put it how you will: “Offense is the best Defense”, “A Pound of Prevention is worth an ounce of cure”, or “A penny saved is a penny earned”; the best way to care for your jewelry (vintage or modern) is to store it properly. What does this mean? Everyone has a different system, my grandma wrapped her necklaces seperately in tissue, I have a friend who collects vintage ring boxes; the point is your jewelry should be stored in a dry place where it can’t get tangled or scratched.

Don’t sleep in your jewelry. Simple and seemingly straight forward, during sleep your jewelry can get twisted, hit, or dirty, and is best off your body. Loves, I admit that I have a bad habit of sleeping my necklaces, but I’m trying to get better at this!

If you’re wearing perfume or hairspray apply it, and make sure it dries, before putting on your jewelry. Oils in these products can damage or discolor your jewelry, and we don’t want that!

Inspect your jewelry regularly. If a stone is loose, or anything is broken, take it to a jeweler.

Investment Piece, fashion, blogger, vintage, belts, necklaces, high fashion, CA, TX

Cleaning

Loves, here’s the thing. Depending on the stone and medal of your piece, the cleaning instructions can vary. Gold and platinum can usually be rinsed with soapy water. Silver needs to be polished. No chemicals at all should be used on pearls, in fact, only wipe them with a soft cloth. If you have costume jewelry with foil back, be aware that water will ruin the piece. Also, various stones require various cleaners, or can have senstiivities to various cleansers. There are many basic jewelry cleaners on the market, and if you follow the instructions they can be great. My advice? Take any jewelry that you’re not sure how to clean to a jeweler. Not only should they be able to let you know the best way to care for your piece, many jewelry stores offer free cleaning. In fact, some of the best jewelry care advice I have gotten is for any repair or care concern to seek out the jewelry store with the best reputation in your area–even if it’s Tiffany’s. The professionals there will not risk the store’s name and can be trusted to give you the best advice they can. And of course, you don’t have to see out a Tiffany’s, several smaller jewelers (like my friends Platt) are fantastic with amazing reputations! A great resource when looking for a jeweler to trust is the American Gem Society (you can find their listing of jewelers here).

I’d love to know: how do you store your jewelry? What are some of your cleaning tips?

XO RA