It’s Mother’s Day (and my birthday!!)!! And really-I wouldn’t be where I am without my mother. When I was a baby we lived in Spain for a while–and my mother would dress me in various outfits all day and take pictures. Clearly something clicked and I like to think that we’re all better off for it! Above is an outfit of hers that I still love to play dress up in, and below is my mommy and me! I hope today you take a moment to tell your mother, or mother-figure, how much you love her! And have some champagne–it’s my birthday and I say so!
Wishing us all an amazing week and even better shoes! xo RA
Can we be honest? Change is hard. Even the change that you want can be hard (ask my hair dresser, I freak out almost every time). And yet–none of us want to stay in the same place forever, right? I would say most of us want to be better versions of ourselves, to have amazing things happen to us, to reach for things, but getting out of our comfort zones can be difficult. Or maybe that’s just me. Say it’s not just me.
Spring is know as the beginning season. Flowers bloom, things start again, and we change. I know that I am changing right now–and some are great and some are scary. I have absolutely no answers but I can tell you 3 things that are helping me get through all the change.
1. Things are going to be okay.
They are. They most likely won’t look like how we think they might, but things have a way of working out for the best. I think our job is just to trust; as my grandma would say a positive attitude makes up for a lot.
2. Be okay with not knowing.
Internet friends this one is a struggle for me daily. I want to know things–all the things. But sometimes, when we’re going through things, we don’t. I’m trying to get comfortable not having an answer in mind, in seeing what happens, in not knowing. Some days are easier than others, but the more I can tell myself it’s okay not to know–it becomes okay not to know.
3. Be compassionate and kind–to yourself
Change is hard. I don’t think being mean to yourself or beating yourself up helps in any way. Just like a friend going through something needs your support, you need your support. So be kind to you–take care of you. If you need a night with friends, a glass of wine, or even new shoes, try to treat yourself like you would a friend.
Hopefully this spring brings for us a summer of changes that were worth it. And if we don’t like it, hey, we can always change again, right?
Wishing you a week of self kindness and amazing shoes! xo RA
There is a myth, or ideal really, that most American women–especially those who love fashion adhere to; that being “French”, or effortless is something to aspire to being. That somehow to be able to throw on anything and have it look perfect,to have your hair fall perfectly everyday; that it is possible to not really try and that you will look perfect and things will work out. And here’s the thing–this is true sometimes. We all have days where our hair is somehow perfect, and no matter what we put on it looks great, our careers and relationships just seem to click and flow; and everything requires minimal effort. I do love effortless days–they make everything seem easy and doable.
On the other hand, the great Tom Ford has said “Dressing well is a form of good manners”. I’m not saying to dress well and being effortless are mutually exclusive–but as much as we strive for effortless, let’s be honest–we all experience the other side of the coin too. We all have days where we have to think about what we wear, try on many options–put effort into our clothes. We have days where we have to spend time on hair and make-up, maybe put in extra effort into our relationships and career because it is needed. Is this effort a bad thing? Hopefully it pays off– and let’s be honest , there are times when putting in the effort is fun, it feels good to try sometimes.
So are these the only two options–putting in effort or being effortless? Are there the types of people who have to try and those who don’t? I don’t have all the answers–I know, that bums me out too. I do think that all of us are both of these types though. I believe that we are all capable of effortless days–and all have days where effort is required. Here’s the big epiphany- I don’t think that one is better than the other. Days where everything from your t-shirt to hair to relationship and career just work are amazing and you should cherish them. Days where you have to think and try for your outfit, lipstick, conversations and meetings are also amazing and you should cherish them.
Maybe effort and effortless are two sides of the same coin; maybe we need one to appreciate the other. Maybe aspiring to effortless is something you should do; maybe trying, even trying too hard occasionally, is something you should do too. All I know is that both can feel good–and that both kinds of days can be good. So this is my wish for us all: great days this week–whether that means you have to put effort into your hair or not.
Whether you think of Sunday as the beginning of the week or the end of the week, Sundays seem to be day when people have routines that they stick to. Laundry and calling your family. Brunch and “Sunday Funday” with friends. Relaxing and reading.In season, watching football (and I will try my hardest not to make this corner a football corner when that season comes!). There is a comfort in knowing what to do and expect on a day of the week–and hopefully you get some rest in there too!
I love Sundays–and yes, I fall into the football ritual group. No matter what I do on Sundays though, I try to take a good half hour to myself. I’m a planner and a list maker (other rituals that bring me comfort), and I like to plan out my week. I know that things will always pop up, but having an idea of what I need to get done always clears my mind–and makes starting the week less stressful.
I’d love to know–what are some of your Sunday rituals?
Loves! If you follow me on Instagam, you know that I’ve been sick this week. I felt it coming on Tuesday, and I was completely down Wednesday and Thursday (and most of Friday). Loves, I am not a good patient. I have plans and to do lists, much like you. I had a way I thought this week would go, and things I thought I would accomplish. Clearly, life had other plans. I’m better, but I’m not 100%. I’m up and doing things, but that tires me and I’m finding I have to let myself rest. I still have emails and goals to accomplish, I have some busy weeks coming up; but I’m finding I am having to let myself relax, let myself rest. I found this old Sunday Chronicle and it really hit home. This week I have so much goodness to share with you, and am working hard on improvements on the newsletter, our posts, and planning for trips. I’m so excited about what’s coming, but today I’m letting myself relax. I’m not going to beat myself up for not getting the list done, for not being ahead. This is worth a reread:
Internet friends! It’s been a week, hasn’t it? Or it has for me-there’s been bad news, long days, and roller coaster emotions. There’s been work done, work left undone, and work half done. A week full of amazing highs and low. And you know what? I’m tired. Really tired. Usually, even when I’m tired, I can muster the energy to plow through – get my to-do list done, feel accomplished. But sometimes? I need a rest. I need it to be okay that the long list with to-do on top isn’t completely marked off, that the kitchen floor isn’t mopped or there are a few emails I could still send. Relaxation can be hard- there is always something to do; it can feel as if we’re measured by what we can get done in a day. There are days when that works. But there are days when it doesn’t. There are days when you need rest- because without a “down day” there can be no days where we rush from task to task. So today I’m giving myself permission -and you as well- to a day off. A day with late breakfasts, good books, and maybe a nap. The kind of day full of nothing that fills you up- because sometimes a day like that is good for you. And because sometimes, we deserve what we need.
Wishing you you a week of rest, productivity, and amazing shoes! Xo RA