I think it’s safe to say that this past year, the pandemic, has been traumatic for all of us. The lockdowns, the virus, the loses, the figuring a new way of doing things. Even though there have been good moments, and even good things- we’ve all had trauma. And if we’re honest, now that it looks like there is some light at the end of the tunnel (yes, it may feel over but the pandemic is still here!), I bet we all have some anxiety.
Or at least I do.
While chatting with a friend the other night, he said something that really stuck with me- sometimes what calms our fears is admitting them. So, after all our trauma, this is me telling you what I’m anxious about it in the hope that it makes us feel better (or less alone), and that when our anxieties see the light of day they run away.
-I’m anxious about people not wearing masks. It’s not that I want us to be masked forever (though there are parts about the masks that I really like). It’s not that I want to police your choices. It’s that (at least in America), masks have become such a political hot potato, and now that it’s a honor system if you’re Vaxxed, etc, I’m finding it never wracking. Perhaps a better way to explain this is that the pandemic has made me anxious about trusting strangers. I hate it, but it’s true. In a perfect world, we would all get our shots and stay home when sick and take care of each other and come out of this making a better world. Through my anxiety I’m doing my part to make that happen.
-I’m anxious that the reopening is happening too fast. Again- I don’t want to go on like this forever, like most of us I’m ready for “normal” and people and things. But. The virus is still out there and I’m a bit worried that in our desire for this to be over we’re going to find ourselves in another wave of high cases/deaths/lockdowns. Maybe I’m just worried this really isn’t over?
-I’m anxious that I’ve become more awkward and anxious, and that those things won’t go away. The few times I’ve gone out and had full days it’s exhausted me. I trust that as time goes on my pre-pandemic energy will return, but what if I stay awkward? What if all these anxieties stick around and get bigger?
There are most likely not easy answers to these worries. Hopefully they will pass in time as I see that things are ok! And fingers crossed I get over this awkward phase- that I relearn how to chat and interact and maybe even flirt?
What are your anxieties and worries about coming out of the pandemic? How are you handling your trauma from this past year? I’m holding space for all us and all those things.
Wishing us calm and amazing shoes this week! Xo RA