We’ve chatted about home before here, but while that was what home means, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the saying “You can’t go home”. I’ve spent the past year bouncing between LA (my adult home) and TX (my childhood home and where I went to college). As I’ve mentioned I’m so lucky that I feel at peace in both places, and that both still feel like home to me. I have friends and loves and life in both– but it is an odd thing to be a bit of a nomand. This past weekend I went back to my college’s (TCU) homecoming and got to see people from my past and present. I also got reminded this past week of the amount of love in both homes. So can you go home?
I’m not the 22 year old I was when I left campus–and to be frank, I wouldn’t want to be. I’ve changed; because of mistakes, wins and losses, and time. I loved the person that I was, but I love who I am now more. And I hope I continue to change (and get better). The people I know and love in both places have changed too; because of mistakes, wins and losses, and time. Some friendships I had have faded for all those reasons. Some, despite all that, have blossomed and are stronger than ever. And again, I have a life in both places you could argue are my home. I often am between these “two” homes, and each time I travel to one I think to myself, “I’m going home”. However, each of these homes mean different things to me. I have lives in each–but those lives are different. And loves, I don’t hate that. I like that I can get different needs met in different homes. No, that’s not for everyone, but it works for me.
So, can you go home? Yes. I think you can. I just think that we have to face a truth: home (no matter what definition you use) changes. It changes, like us, due to mistakes, wins, and losses; time takes a toll on us all. It is the same, and different, and I think that’s good. We’re not the same we were years ago–why should home be? I think the trick is to appreciate the things about home that stay the same; and appreciate the things about home that change. Is that easy? Not always, but if home can make room for our new parts, we can allow home the same. As I’ve thought about this quote, and my own homes, I think the issue here is not really can you go home, but can you go back to exactly how things were. And loves, I have moments I would love to relive–but we can’t. And maybe, just like home, the lesson is to make room for all the new parts.
I’d love to know–do you think you can go home?
Wishing us all a week of home-comings and amazing shoes! XO RA