Sunday Chronicles – Page 13

Sunday Chronicles: Holiday Stress

Investment Piece: Holiday Stress

It’s the holiday season! Which means lots of magic and special moments. And it can also mean a lot of stress. There can be endless to-do lists, the house cleaning and decorating, the gift giving, and in the before all the events- parties, etc. Then on top of that, there are all the expectations and the desires to make things perfect. This is such a wonderful time of the year. And this is such a stressful time of the year.

I’ll be honest, I thought that this year might not be as stressful. Due to the pandemic (which yes, is stressful by itself), we’re at home and a lot of the events and “bigness” of the holiday season are naturally cut out. My family is choosing to do things much more laid back, and my friends are doing the same. While, even in the before, I would have told you that a holiday is not measured by how much you get done or the “perfect” way things are done (which let’s be honest, is not a thing), I especially thought that this year could be a respite of holiday stress.

Yet, I’m stressed. Holiday stress. I’m still feeling pressure to be perfect-in how I decorate, the small things I’m doing for others, in work, in everything. Right now nothing feels like it’s enough. Maybe it’s because I thought it would be so easy that things are so stressful? Or maybe I thought that because things were simple this year I could make them “perfect”, therefore putting more pressure on myself?

I’m not sure. We got the tree and lights up this weekend–and they look great! But I worried that we were late. I’m “behind” at work and feeling all sorts of pressure- I have a plan and things will get done, but I’ve been beating myself up about not being ahead or doing more.

In every aspect of my life I’ve been adding pressure and worried that things aren’t enough. I’m not going anywhere, there are no parties, and I’m not even exchanging a ton of gifts. But I’m feeling holiday stress.

If you, as my friend, came to me I would remind you that you are enough, that whatever gets done is enough, that perfect is not a thing, and the best moments are often unplanned and a little silly.
Why is it so hard to say that to ourselves (or myself)?

Because I know that’s true. This season has been full of laid back and special moments that will make this time during a pandemic amazing. There is good here and there is joy. I don’t know how to get rid of the stress, I’ve been working through my to-do list and I’m hoping that helps. I’m reminding myself (more than once daily) that the perfect I’m chasing is a myth and that I can relax (Champagne helps with this). I’m reaching out to friends. And I’m choosing to do things that bring joy.

Let’s see if it works.

Do you have holiday stress? How are you dealing with it? Do you have any tips for dealing with stress?
I’m all ears!

Wishing us all a week of respite and amazing shoes!
Xo RA

Sunday Chronicles: Holiday Behind

Investment Piece: Let's get in formation

We’re headed right into the holiday season. And in a year that’s been different, with much more time at home, and a holiday season that should be pared down, you would think that I might be on top of things. Ahead of things even.

Alas, I am behind. Holiday behind. Ever since my area began “Stay at Home” orders back in March, I feel as if my schedule, preparedness, and even dressing goes in cycles. It’s as if I can have 3 or 4 days of great work, outfits, and productivity. And then 3 or 4 days where I’m not completely worthless (we never are), but everything from outfits to crossing items off my do-to list is just more difficult. I’ve managed, hopefully well, but on top of that now is the holiday season.

This holiday season should be great! It has to be laid back, you have the perfect excuse not to do anything you don’t want to, and it’s a chance to start smaller traditions or cut out traditions you hate. Have chicken or steak instead of turkey. Eat pie all day! Whatever makes you happy.

(Another story is how one of my best Thanksgivings was spent alone! Low Key Holidays are amazing)

And while I’m not traveling, there are no big parties, and my family is working on paring down and being laid back, I’m still somehow behind. On work-from calendars and posts to too many little things to mention. At life- from bills and planing to holiday cards and the like. On personal things- doing my nails (which just makes me feel better) has been on my to-do list for weeks. Is that the most important thing? Nope, but is it telling that a task that brings me joy I just can’t make time for? I hope not.

If I were writing advice to you, I would say that this is a holiday season to focus on what makes you happy. That the cards and the calendars and all those things either get done or they don’t, and that the important thing is taking care of you. Why can’t I take that advice? Probably a completely different post.

Maybe, as this is the holiday season where we all slow down, we can agree not to be behind. That behind is something we’re making up in our heads. That whatever gets put up or sent out is the best and that if we spent days in pjs eating chocolate that it’s a valid celebration.

I’m trying to think like that. And trying to get things done.
How are you dealing with this holiday season? Are you behind? Are you somehow getting things done? How are you feeling about it all?

Any tips or commiserating welcome!

Wishing us all a week of productivity and amazing shoes!
Xo RA

Sunday Chronicles: Woman In Gold

In another life I would have been an art thief– or an art investigator, insurance agent, etc. I am simply fascinated by the value we place on art (it makes the living worthwhile) and the act of stealing art–and the act of recovering that stolen art. My interest began a few years ago when my mom and I began reading novels and non-fiction books about the subject–and I’m just hooked. The Gardner Museum Heist, Nazi theft of art, Monuments Men–all the stories are just spellbinding. So of course I fell in love with the story of Maria Altman who fought the Austrian government to reclaim the portrait of her aunt, Adele Bloch-Bauer, painted by Gustav Klimt and stolen by the Nazis.

The movie got lukewarm reviews–but I loved it. I think what happened during WWII was horrific, but these are stories that we need to tell over and over again. The Holocaust was not only a mass murder of a people; it was a theft of people’s culture, homes, memories and was orchestrated by the Nazi government. I have jewelry, dishes, artwork in my home that are made special because those things belonged to my grandparents or were family heirlooms. I can’t imagine those items being stolen from off of my walls or off of my tables because of my religion. As much as the stories of the Nazis stealing from people can be down right upsetting, I found comfort in the justice that Marie Altman’s story contains. Art does make life bearable. While we can have debates about who owns what and museum’s roles in the care of art, in this particular case (and others like it) I don’t think that anyone can argue that the surviving families of the Holocaust, or those whose possessions were stolen by Nazis, should have their belongings returned.

So see the movie! Tell me what you think! I also read the book (pictured above)–it goes into way more detail, and also made me long to go to the opera in Vienna (I have shoes that would look great there). Also, because any excuse to shop, the Neue Galerie in New York (where Adele’s portrait now hangs) is selling this specialty lipstick set inspired by the painting. Of course I bought one and of course I love it!

Wishing you a week of amazing art, some history lessons, and of course fabulous fashion!

Sunday Chronicles: Reset

Investment Piece: How to Holiday: Red and Sparkle

We aren’t waiting anymore, which always feels good.
And now that we’re not, we can take stock: of the new month, the holidays, where we are, where we’re going. 2020 hasn’t been the easiest of years-the pandemic and how that has affected all parts of our lives, among other things. Now we’ve made it to the holiday season, and while it is beginning to feel hopeful, it’s also felt like this year has been a lot.

How I’m dealing with it all (the end of waiting, the start of the end of the year, the hope and the fear) is a reset. I’m taking time today to take stock. What is it that I want to get done in the rest of the year? What is the foundation I want to set for 2021? What do I want to act like? And most importantly, what do I want to wear?

My reset today is contemplating all of that, making plans, resting, and using this break to set up the rest of the year for all that I want it to be. How are you spending today? Are you resetting?
What is it we want from the rest of this year and how can we get it done?

I’ll let you know where my reset gets me!

Wishing us all a week of respite and amazing shoes! XO RA

Sunday Chronicles: Go Vote

Investment Piece: Go Vote

This is an image I post on my personal Facebook page every election to make the point that change happens on the local level. That it’s in your best interest to care about what’s happening in your community. And this image is just funny!

I almost didn’t post it here, I resisted doing this post. If you’re in the States (or watching from abroad), you know Tuesday is Election Day. You may have already voted, you may be tired of election emails and flyers and calls, you may be feeling a lot (from outrage to exhaustion), you may be doing a lot (voter outreach), or may be worried you’re not doing enough. I am all of that too. This is a place for fashion, and if it’s a place of respite for you I don’t want to take that away from you. I promise not to lecture, or try to sway your vote, but as small a platform as this may be, I felt I had to say something.

Voting matters. Policy matters. We all try to be apolitical, but the reality is that politics and policy affect our lives–so when given a chance, we should vote for the world we want, the policies that would help the collective we.

The mission of Investment Piece is to tell stories using fashion. I firmly believe that fashion and stories matter. That art and beauty matter. That all of us (all our neighbors) matter. There could even be an argument made that art and beauty and each other are the only things that do matter.
I love my job. I love coming up with outfits and telling stories and showcasing other people’s stories here. It feels me with joy, and I know I’m lucky to do something that I love.

I want more joy (and art and stability and all the good things) for all of us. It won’t solve everything, but voting is my way of getting us more joy. Joy starts at a local level, and voting should start there, too.

Vote, research, vote for all the things and joy and hope that you want for the collective we. Here, we’ll be back to fashion soon, I promise. Thank you for indulging me on this message. I hope it wasn’t too much!

Wishing us all a week of joy and amazing shoes!
Xo RA

Sunday Chronicles: Back to Normal

Investment Piece: Back to Normal

I’ve mentioned before how much I love my spin workouts and spin classes. With the pandemic, lockdowns, and trying to stay safe I haven’t really been able to indulge in one of my favorite things for months. Getting back to normal, or at least a part of it to me, involved getting back on a bike. Or so I thought.

Recently, meaning longer ago than I would like to admit, I bought myself a spin bike for home to use with various apps and online classes, to get back to normal and get back on a bike. The bike has been sitting, waiting to be assembled. I’ve gone on runs, completed other workouts, and had a lot of down time. I’ve missed spin class and been jealous of other people’s home bikes. And yet, the bike has stayed in its box.

If this is a part of getting back to normal for me, why can’t I bring myself to put it together? Are you resisting anything “normal” for you right now?

Investment Piece: I workout

I actually plan on making myself put the bike together today (it’s part of my fall “redo” of the house). And while I would love to tell you that between battling allergies and work and all the things, what’s been keeping me from putting together this “normal” piece for me is all of that, I know it’s a little bit more.

Honestly, I’m scared that it won’t be the same. The bike, the classes, the new normal. And loves, it won’t. It can’t. Even if it’s the best bike and the online classes are amazing, it won’t be the same as going to studios that I love with people I love. This bike will be getting back to normal, but it will be the new normal. And admitting that, even after all the months at home and adjustments and precautions, has been difficult for me.

I’m not going to lecture you on what you, or we as a country or group, should be doing about pandemic precautions. It shouldn’t be a touchy subject, but it is, and we all have various levels of comfort with various activities. For me, right now, the bike at home makes the most sense. But it also means accepting that normal right now is not the normal I knew.

New is fun! It’s exciting and shiny. But it can also be scary, unknown, and at times lonely. There are things that I loved about lockdown, and spending more time at home. But there are times when these times feel scary and unknown.
So I’ve left a bike I know I’ll love in the box. I do know I’ll love it. I plan on ripping the bandaid off today, putting it together, and I’m sure later on IG I’ll be posting about how much I love having a bike at home. And even, when things are the most back to normal, I know I will probably love having a bike at home for when I can’t make class, or when I need to workout on my own timeline. The happiness is certain.

However, there’s also a sadness and a little uncertainty. And I would be lying to you if I didn’t admit that, too. Maybe both the happiness and the sadness are part of getting back to normal. And maybe, instead of avoiding that, the truth is we’re lucky to be able to feel so much.
Is that normal?

Wishing us all a week of normality and amazing shoes!
Xo RA

Sunday Chronicles: VOTE!

Investment Piece: Be Ambitious

Beloveds, if you’re in the States you know that Election Day is 11/3, but voting has started! Several states have begun early voting, mail in voting, and absentee voting! It’s a great day to research the voting places in your district, to research your local and federal races, and to make your voting plan (if you haven’t already!). My state opens early voting on Tuesday, and my plan is to get in and cast my ballot ASAP.

Your voice is important. You matter. Your vote matters (otherwise no one would be trying to make it hard to vote). I’m not going to claim that voting is the only route to change- but I will say that change happens at the local levels (the mayor in Jaws was still the mayor in Jaws 2!) and that I believe in our duty to be involved. We know I love shoes, but what’s more important than those? Voting. Let’s make our voices heard.

See you at the polls!

Wishing us all a week of civic duty and amazing shoes!
XO RA

Sunday Chronicles: Being Dumb

Investment Piece: Dumb

loves, I’m laid up with allergies and a sinus infection there’s been a lot of tea and resting, and thinking. During the times that I can’t be “fashion”, what am I? During these times when all of our schedules have been off and we may not have been our best- does that make us who we are? I wrote this when I first started this blog; I was figuring out how to write, how to shoot, how to do this. Not to mention, what my voice and purpose were. I like to think we all have come a long way. But, there are still things that remain true: like we’re layered, that loving this concept of fashion says nothing about your intelligence, and that we’re all still growing.xo RA

Does loving fashion mean you’re dumb?

If you know me for five minutes you catch onto a few things- I love fashion, especially shoes, and I’m not ashamed of that fact. Is this the only defining feature I have? Heavens no! Although, to be fair, it is an obvious one. To me this quality is one that goes with being tall and blonde– it’s who I am, I give no thought to it.

So imagine my surprise a few years ago at a dinner party I threw, with a delicious champagne risotto I’m still proud of, that a friend of mine turned to me and said, “I’m surprised you’re a good cook, I mean you like fashion”. Really? Liking one thing automatically prevents you from having another skill set?

Know me for ten or fifteen minutes you pick up on other things- I love sports (don’t call me when my teams are playing), I’m an insatiable reader, I love true crime, cooking, am religious about my workouts, and have a weird obsession with art theft. Do any of these qualities ultimately define me? I think not–aren’t we all really complex, layered creatures? One quality cannot define a person–and if we have to make a fashion tie in, if I was one dimensional could I love both high end shoes and sweat pants? Probably not. And I do.

But let’s examine the real issue– if we can agree everyone can have more than one interest, does liking fashion make you dumb? Is fashion dumb? I, clearly, am going to say no. Argue what you like–clothes have power. Putting on a certain outfit, a certain pair of shoes–you move a certain way, you feel a certain way, it affects you. That isn’t dumb– that’s power. Also, look a Zac Posen dress, look at the draping, tell me that’s not art– not a superior craft. I will argue for days that shoes that are well made are easier to walk in, no matter how high the heel. If there is that much skill and power in what you put on your body, how can it be dumb? How can an interest in that be dumb?

So, somewhat proudly, I tell you — no fashion doesn’t make you dumb. If anyone tells you other wise look them in the eyes and dare them to prove it to you.

Wishing us all a week of layered thoughts and amazing shoes!

xo RA

Sunday Chronicles: Rituals

Investment Piece: Rituals

I’ve been thinking a lot about rituals recently. When I think of rituals, I can’t help but think of church (specifically Catholic Church, even though I was not raised Catholic), but really, we all have so many rituals. How we wake up, and our morning routines are rituals. Our evening routines are rituals. How we pray. How we mourn. (Again, the church thing). So much of what we do as humans can be based on rituals. And I don’t know about you, but with the pandemic my schedule and my rituals are off.

I can tell you what sets me up for my best days-my rituals. Naming at least 5 things I’m grateful for, a couple of goals for the day, at least one HUGE cup of coffee, a walk, a hard workout. But lately, these rituals have been all over the place. There are days I’m ready to go at 7a, and days I sleep into 9a. (Don’t get me started on my sleep schedule in the pandemic). I’ve been thinking about how I could set a morning ritual- but so far nothing has stuck.

If you’re in the States, you can agree that our rituals for mourning (the huge number of dead) and the loss of so much (life isn’t back to “normal”) have gone completely out the window. Which makes mourning, on both a personal and a national level difficult. It can make functioning difficult.

So, if on many levels, our rituals are being disrupted, what do we do?

Honestly, I don’t know.

Do we do our old rituals half way? Come up with new rituals? Wait till we can do what we need?
Maybe? I don’t know

This is what I’m doing.
I’m trying to stick to the rituals that work for me- which means making my mornings work no matter what time I wake up. It means sticking to my rituals even when it’s just me and it’s imperfect.
I’m adapting. I’m trying new things, new routines, new rituals. Some are working and sticking. Some are not.
I’m waiting. I’m hoping there will be normal, we can mourn and do our rituals together. I’m not stopping our lives, but I’m holding space.

How are you dealing with your routines and rituals right now? Are they different? What do they look like?
I would love to know and learn from you!

Wishing us all a week of comforting rituals and amazing shoes! Xo RA

Sunday Chronicles: Behind

Investment Piece: Sunday Chronicles

I was raised by women who believe in being on time. In fact, not on time, early. 15 mins early is on time? More like 30. I was a straight A student in high school, and was also raised to be prepared.

Both lessons I’ve tried to take into my adult life as much as possible.

Loves, I am behind. Not a little behind. Not 5 mins late. Behind, as in there are days when I wonder at what point am I catching up and at what point am I starting over?

The reason I’m behind? More than one. Family issues came to the forefront. In the middle of cleaning out my closet, planning more than one shoot, keeping the editorial calendar current, collabs current, personal life up, back pain, etc, etc. The last few weeks have been filled with feelings of overwhelm. And the knowledge that I’m behind, and would rather be ahead.

I’m not sure how to get in front once we’re behind. Do you? The following is what I’ve been doing, and it does help, though I’m sure that there might be better techniques (and if you’ve got them I would love to hear them!)

I’ve been honest
With clients, friends, family, whoever has asked. It’s not an easy thing to admit. That I’m behind. That I don’t think I can make that event, or deadline. That I need to push somethings back. That there’s a lot on my plate and I need some help. But. When I don’t admit it, the behind gets worse. And I’ve found that most people get it. My clients understand and need the extra time themselves! My friends and family understand I can’t make it, or pitch in and help. In fact, it’s made some of my relationships better to admit that I need a little help. Being behind as a good thing? Maybe.

Prioritize
I’m so behind there’s no way I’m getting everything done in a day. Or two. So, each day I’ve tried to limit my to-do list to 2 or 3 things I KNOW I can get done. I’m still aware of allllll the things, but actually getting things crossed off helps. And when I have too much to do I tend to do nothing. Weird? Maybe. But, true, for me at least.

Be OK with it
This may be the hardest thing. There are things I’m not getting done (though maybe I will at some point) and I’m behind. If I don’t like admitting it, I sure don’t like it. But. It’s where I am. The things that HAVE to happen, are happening. And I’m finding they all happen “on time”. And the things that may not get done? Maybe they don’t have to? I’m slowly and surely learning to be ok with that. It’s not easy, but it’s helping.

I would love to hear any and all tips you have about getting ahead once you’re behind!!

Wishing us all a week of not being behind and amazing shoes!
XO RA