Loves, it’s officially the week that we celebrate love, which is fantastic! I’m a big fan of love, in all its forms: self love, romantic love, friendship love, family love. Love is amazing and deserves to be celebrated. I have some thoughts on Valentine’s Day though (you can read them here and please click on the link to my friend’s article in that piece, it’s still a great read about this holiday). However, I’m not here to not Valentine’s, I’m here to talk about the love of your life. And this is the plot twist. What if you were the love of your life? Humor me. What if you talked to yourself like you do to a loved one? Treated yourself like you do a loved one? Protected and pampered yourself like you do a loved one? What would that look like?
I’m all for love. I really am. But often, when talking about love I feel like we leave out the self-love celebration. Self care can be hard (I wrote about that here), and that is important; but what is self love beyond that? Yes, let’s care for ourselves, but how exactly do we love ourselves? I hope that you have great friends, family and love life; but the one person who you can always count on is you. So how do we make ourselves the loves of our lives? I’m not 100% sure. However, I have some ideas.
Spend Time With You
Self dates, dates, alone time-whatever you want to call it, you need it. And not in the big way, though I see nothing wrong with taking yourself to a nice dinner, show, or museum; in fact, I recommend it. I’m talking about spending time with yourself. Get to know you, figure out what you really love, and what you don’t. Enjoy your own company: make yourself laugh, be there when you cry, treat yourself. You’ll see a ton of articles in the coming days about date night and how to treat that someone special. I say, take some time and treat yourself to the same things.
Learn to Say No to What Doesn’t Serve You
We’ve all had the friend who was dating or doing something that we knew was wrong for her; and sometimes we had to do the hard thing and let her know. You’re your friend, act like it. If there’s a relationship or job or activity that isn’t right for you, leave it. This can be easier said than done, and may take some time; but you deserve what’s best for you. Pro tip: Even if someone tries to shame or rebuke you for this, follow your heart, we have instincts for a reason.
Put Yourself First
I’ve mentioned that I’m a “Sex and the City” fan, and I am (it was the first fashion blog, I have to be!). In the movie of the same name, Samantha (#selflovegoals) says to her boyfriend, “I love you, but I love me more”. And she admitted that “was not what she was supposed to say”. Loves, this isn’t a call to leave all your relationships, be selfish, or act like a brat. This is the combination of self care, learning to say no, and time with you; you are important and you matter. However, if you don’t think that, no one else will. So, find ways to put yourself first in your life. Yes, this may mean saying no to relationships and jobs that aren’t for you. This may mean saying no to people you love. This may mean following your dreams when people think you’re crazy; or placing boundaries that people don’t like. Do it. Do it all. You are the love of your life, treat yourself like it.
How do you practice self love? I have to admit, my self love involves some shoes, wine, chocolate, and fantastic fashion; but this week, as I celebrate all the love in my life, I am going to take some time for me. I am the love of my life, and I deserve to be treated as such!
Wishing us all a week of love and amazing shoes! XO RA