Fashion Stories: Wedding Guest

a woman in a teal and gold lame dress under string lights

One of my first posts in this series was about wedding dresses (and how we hang onto them and why) while wearing my great-great-grandma’s wedding dress (you can read about it here). So, in a way, it seems a bit full circle that I’m now writing about being a wedding guest (and what I wore and why) for a recent family wedding.

Let’s be honest: weddings are a great ritual, a great party, a great time and a stressful event for many. Recently my cousin got married (and I’m not sharing pics as it’s not my news but let me say that she was STUNNING and that the event- from top to bottom- by a lake, with gold Dinos as decorations, with family dancing- was just perfect), and like anyone else, I worried about what to wear to the wedding.

I was not a part of the bridal party, but I am who I am, and knowing that Id see family that I don’t often to visit with, when my invitation said “cocktail”, I knew that I wanted to look special (and not upstage the bride). So, below, from lunch with cousins to wedding to the morning after brunch (of which I was a hostess), I break down what I wore and why. Weddings are big stories- for all of us. I hope my choices help you in similar situations, or just inspire you to get dressed up!

Cousins Lunch
a woman in a white silk shirt and lilac corduroy pants with snakeskin mules

The day before the wedding, I had lunch with come cousins I hadn’t been able to catch up with in years! A casual affair, yes, but I wanted to look my best! My choice? A silk shirt with corduroy pants. Easy, seasonal, and yet chic- this combo would work with any color combo (I happened to choose purple and white for my college colors and CFB season!) and while I choose a chic flat, from boots to heels almost any shoe will do!

What I love: it’s easy and yet elegant. Super on point with textures, and easy to customize with colors and shoes!

What I would do differently: I did feel a bit undone. A belt would help, or adding more jewelry!

Wedding
a woman in a teal and gold lame dress on rocks by a lake

You may have read about this dress here. It’s new (to me, vintage Hanea Mori) and when I got it, I knew that I had to wear it to the wedding. I felt as if it were perfect- fallish colors, midi length, long sleeved, and cocktail. But not overpowering – it wasn’t a gown, it’s a cocktail dress- and with the right gold shoes and jewelry, I felt like I nailed it!

What I love: everything. Everything about this dress. The fit. The color. Invite me to all your events so I can wear it again! I also felt like it wasn’t so over the top that I upstaged anyone (the last thing I would want to do!) but yet felt so good in it (and got a ton of compliments!).

What I would change: Not. A. Thing.

Morning After Brunch

a woman in a Dino print button down with sleeves rolled up and black jeans

For the morning after brunch, I knew that I needed something casual (yet chic), and I wanted to make a nod to the happy couple! As the table decorations at the reception were decorated with gold painted Dinos I felt as if a Dino shirt would be incredibly appropriate! Paired with a “nice” pair of jeans (and un-pictured amazing shoes!), it was a hit!

What I loved: Such an inside joke and felt like a cute outfit, even when I was “working”

What I would change: I loved the outfit but as we had to clean before and after the brunch I wish I had brought non-high waisted comfy pants and something I didn’t care about getting dirty for that!

I was very lucky as I didn’t have to travel for this wedding, meaning that if I put something on and it didn’t work I had my entire closet at my disposal. I know that’s not always the case, so a few of my wedding guest dressing tips:

-Plan in advance and take a backup. You just never know!
-Comfort and chic-ness are key. Yes, you want to impress everyone you haven’t seen in ages, but you want to move and dance, etc, with ease. There is a balance to be found!
-Look your best but adhere to the “rules”. Usually this means no white dresses, no overdressing, no upstaging the bridge, etc
-Have fun! Weddings are for the couple- and for families! Enjoy it all, from the event to what you wear!

What have you worn to recent weddings and what concerns about wedding dressing do you have? I would love to help you out with them and hear all about it!

XO RA

Fashion Stories: I Miss Abandon

Investment Piece: I miss Abandon
Investment Piece: I miss abandon

I’ve been thinking a lot about how we dress for our days has changed within the past years. Dressing for joy, dressing for function, dressing for bed.
Some disclosures:
-I’ve always had a thing for party dresses and not always enough parties to wear them. Now, I’m getting DRESSED to go to the store, but there is a section of my closest that’s not getting enough wear right now. Yet, I have more than one party dress on my current Wishlist.
-I want to write about how we should buy and wear whatever makes us happy. I DO believe in that. I’ve also ordered a bunch of leggings this week (they’re pants now?) and there are days when getting dressed at all is hard.
-While I love going into stores and finding something I didn’t know I wanted, I also love shopping online. In fact, I’ll tell you online shopping is so easy (and it’s like you get presents!). Right now I’m missing in person shopping.
-Things are difficult for everyone right now. Budgets. Stress. It all. Dressing for anything may not be at the top of our lists. I do think it helps, though.

These pictures are old. From years ago, on a Los Angeles spree, one afternoon in RecessLa (you can read about them here), on a whim I spent several hours trying on things. We took pictures and laughed and just enjoyed the fashion. It turns out, I had a ton of these on my phone. Looking through them made me smile. And for all my thoughts about fashion right now it made me realize:

I miss abandon.

Investment Piece: I miss abandon
Investment Piece: I miss abandon
Investment Piece: I miss abandon
Investment Piece: I miss abandon

I miss spending hours falling in love with new things and trying them on. Imagining where to wear them. I miss finding a thing I didn’t know I needed and walking out of a store feeling new.

There are friends of mine who are already planning to dress BIG whenever they can-from concerts to movies, and I’m with them. Any chance I get I’m DRESSING. And I’m on board with that. But I do worry that I will still miss abandon. The random. The surprises.

I miss good surprises.

So. Now. With what we have. How do we invite abandon in? Order something exciting online? Try a new online store? Shop all the vintage on IG and Etsy? I’m in. But I’m open to all ideas.

How are you dressing with abandon right now? How do you think we should invite it in?

This was a vintage dress, I didn’t get it, but I’ve found similar and have linked them below for us all.

I’m wishing us all a little abandon this week, whatever that looks like!
Xo RA

Investment Piece: I miss abandon

Fashion Stories: Swim as Street Wear

I love the water, which means that I often am in need of an updated swimsuit. BUT more often than not, when I am shopping for swim I think about fashion. More often than not, when I am shopping for swim I am thinking not about the pool or the beach but about fashion. I have mentioned more than once that I wear many of my swim wear as fashion. From one pieces to bikinis tops, there are so many swim suits that I wear as either body suits or crop tops. Swim as fashion or street wear is nothing new to me- in fact my swim “close” is divided into swim I wear in the water and those I wear with fashion. As we head into not only holiday weeks but into the heat of summer I am looking to update not only swim for the water but swim for the fashion.

I know this is not the only time I have written or worn my swim as fashion (truly, are the two separate?). Every year, once the temps heat up I slip into something a bit swim- and I think my outfits are better for it. (this is usually where I link all the swim I love. I will in future posts! there are also a few cover ups I have my eyes on- and in my cart!)
How do you wear your swim? What do think of wearing swim as fashion?
If you (like me) wear your swim as fashion I would love to see how to style it!
XO RA

Fashion Stories: Hostess Dress

I think I am rounding out the bug I have had as I want to dress up again! Yet- because I am still not 100% I am looking at hostess dresses. And caftans. And all things lounge that look like a party dress. And as a reminder:

a woman in a purple hostess dress on a red couch

This is the time of year when we’re looking for looks that are festive but yet, super comfy. Or at least I am. I love me a good party dress, I can’t resist a party dress, but at this time of year, I’m usually a bit overwhelmed and a bit behind, so while I want to be in a party dress I still need to be comfy.

My secret weapon for this? A hostess dress. Part fancy robe, part party dress that lets you go from
This:
a woman in a purple cape dress spinning
to this:
a woman in a purple hostess dress un bed

OR in simple terms a hostess dress is:
The idea of a hostess outfit as somewhere between loungewear and partywear has been around since the 1920s. In 1925, Vogue decided pajamas were de rigueur, especially should you be able to acquire an Elsa Schiaparelli housecoat-and-pajama-pants set. In the ’60s, caftans and palazzo pants became the hostess outfit du jour. Since then, the idea of dressing up for company tends to mean something fancy and not all that comfortable. (read more on these thoughts here)
or you could put a hostess dress like:
an informal dress or robe to entertain at home.

Incredibly popular in the 1940s-60s, you can read more about hostess gowns here and here. But yes, hostess gowns are part robe/part party dress, sometimes more sheer, sometimes more embroidered, but for me- the perfect combination of chic and comfy.

A woman in a black and green hostess dress at a backyard party
This is a hostess dress.

As is my new favorite (purple with a but of a cape):
a woman in a purple hostess dress leaning against a wall

There are so many hostess dresses out there (I’ve linked some of my vintage favorites for you below, and my go-to sites are Esty and the Gem app) but for me, what ties them together is the mix of lounge wear and party wear. Hostess dress were the first dresses (or pant suits!) to toe the line between pajamas and ball gowns. And as much as I love party dresses, I also love lounge and fancy pjs, so I think that hostess dresses are heaven. (I also love the idea that in days gone past, people would just throw these on to have neighbors over for drinks or even just to chat with their husband!)

woman in a silver caftan in front of a balcony

Since Covid, I’ve discovered a passion from caftans- which are a direct descendant from hostess dresses, which explains part of my love of hostess dresses. As they range from more formal to incredibly informal, there is a hostess gown (especially as wearing vintage makes it even more special!) for every holiday party or at home drink you have on your calendar!

Have you ever worn a hostess dress? Do you love them as much as I do? I hope that you find a part robe/ball gown aka hostess dress that lets you tell all of the most amazing holiday fashion stories this season. And I also hope that said hostess dress keeps you comfy as you look amazingly chic. Again, I’m linking my current favorites below (including a green exact copy of this purple one!), if you need help finding your perfect hostess dress please let me know!

XO RA

Note: This post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!

a woman in a purple hostess dress in a doorway

Fashion Stories: Fashion As Rebellion

A woman in a tee that says Hands Off, a black blazer and jeans

I am a firm, FIRM, believer that fashion is just another way with which we tell our stories. Fashion as a story telling fabric is the basis of what we do here. SO. Fashion as a way to speak out- for anything that you believe in. OR in general show rebellion? Yes. I’m here for it.

I know the most obvious way to tell our rebellious or political or out there stories are graphic tees. And from tees to sweatshirts I have a ton of graphic shirts. Graphic shirts with anything are a go-to formula for me. From shirts that are simply “Wonder Woman” to the more forceful graphic like above (and yes, that’s tame in my collection!) a graphic is an easy way to let people know your stance. But fashion is so much more subtle and lets us tell our stories in so many ways!

Investment Piece: Mini Skirting It
(This may not be the best example!)
But often when I think of fashion as rebellion I think of mini skirts in the 1960s. And how then men went from suits to longer hair and flares. Burning Bras. Tye Dye. NOTE: I am not old enough to have lived through that. I was not in the 1960s. Though- I was a teenager when Elmo and Grunge (ya know, flannels and ripped jeans and dark eye make up and combat boots) were all popular. Perhaps every generation has its own fashion that is a form of rebellion.

To truly understand how to dress to rebel (and not just dressing in what people you know what like), let’s understand what rebellion is:
According to the dictionary rebellion is:
an act of violent or open resistance to an established government or ruler

There are times when what we wear absouletly is in service of actively over throwing the government. Then there are times that what we wear is simply to let our displeasure known. To make a fuss. To give support. And to let people know where we stand.

I have never actively worked to throw over the government. But I have worn shirts and ears in supports of causes I love. In thinking about our stories, and how rebellion could be one- I’ve thought a lot about what we wear. From hem lines to high heels to shirts that give to causes.

Some reading that I’ve found helpful on these thoughts:
The Clothes that Shook The World
Rebellion, Gender, Fashion
You Say You want a (Fashion) Revolution?
and from sheer to faux fur, mob wife to mesh flats, 2024 has its own trends already (and we all know more to come). Wearing things like faux fur and being BIG can be rebellion (or at least a pendulum swing). Or dressing well- instead of wearing pjs to the grocery store (I am guilty of both!). All Black. Pops of Color. Pink. Bows. Prints. Mixing Prints. Black Nails. Anklets. All of these have been told to me to be a bit rebellious. I don’t know that rebellion always has to go against the status quo- but it does have to be unexpected.

Investment Piece: Product of a Strong Female

Interestingly enough, too young to have been around when mini skirts were a STATEMENT, I never burned a bra (too young), and while I was here for Nirvana and some Elmo in high school — it feels as if I have sort of missed so many fashion rebellion moments. Even sheer is no longer new (though it might be a bit more daring at times). SO. How do we rebel with our fashion now?

Is it by being more daring?
By wearing graphic tees in support of our causes?
Wearing the unexpected?

I don’t know! But I’m open to it all and will be telling my own story in the above ways.

As there is no clear way to tell you how to rebel in your fashion below I’ve linked fashion that supports causes that are dear to me– no pressure to you! Below are shirts that give to Gun Control, Women Homelessness, Reproductive Rights. But I know there is more out there. And you could always go anti trend. Or let me know how you’re dressing in an anti establishment way!!

XO RA

Note: this Post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!

a woman in a white tee with black letters saying we should all be feminists and red pants and black heels

Fashion Stories: Ossie Clark

Loves! It’s the time of month where we go into our closets to see what stories live there. This month? I was lucky enough to chat with Lauren from Timeless Vixen about her Ossie Clark collection. It’s amazing. And I can’t wait to get back into her closet and really play. Also –I’d love to come play in your closet! What do you collect?

In the meantime, let’s enjoy my convo with Lauren about her 109 pieces of Ossie Clark (yes, her closet is #goals)

Also- you can read about Lauren and Ossie (and a recent Italian exhibit here)

And read more about Lauren’s collection here

Hope you enjoy!

Xo RA

Personalized from Abbott Lyon

Recently I got (was gifted but that does not affect my opinions) special pieces from Abbott Lyon. From the high quality to the personalization- I can’t get over how much I love these pieces and how these pieces add to my day to day. My favorite is the charm necklace (made for my cats, as I have become that cat lady!) that lets me take my loves with me everywhere! And you can treat yourself of someone you love by getting 2 for 1 site wide with code LTK2for1. Below I am linking my faves but the whole site of Abbott Lyon is a must!

What do you love to wear in your day to day? XO RA

Note: This post does contain affiliate links, while that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!

Shop my pieces here

Fashion Stories: Her Mom’s Dress

Investment Piece: Her Mom's Dress
Investment Piece: Her Mom's Dress
Investment Piece: her Mom's Dress
Investment Piece: Her Mom's Dress

As someone who is just fascinated by the stories we tell with our fashion, the things we keep, the ones we let go of, and the stories the get told after we’re gone- it’s always a honor when someone gifts me a special fashion item.

This dress is chic enough on its own: the way you can wear it on or off the shoulder. With or without a belt. With almost any shoe, heel, boots, even sneakers. The tassel tie. It’s a vintage Arpeja-California, under the label Young Edwardian. Known for their styles influenced by 1960s British boutique fashion, retro trends, and focusing on youth and trend-oriented clothing, one of my favorite things about the brand is that its ads featured Lynda Carter.

If Wonder Woman likes it, it has to be fantastic!
Investment Piece: Her Mom's Dress
DInvestment Piece: her Mom's dress

I’ve worn this dress to a neighborhood party. To run errands. And to meet a friend for lunch.

But what makes this dress so incredibly special to me? It’s from one of my dearest, bestest friend’s mom. That would be so kind on its own, but not only did my friend’s mom pass down the dress, she passed down her story of it. My friend’s mom wore this number to a wedding in the 1970s. It made her feel magic and sparkly, and she hung onto until this summer when it was gifted to me- to make more magic in it.

To be trusted with that, to be given the chance to carry on someone’s fashion story? It’s much more than a dress (which I love), it’s a honor. I only hope to give this dress all the stories it deserves.

Investment Piece: Her Mom's Dress

What thing has been passed down to you? How are you carrying on its fashion story?
I would love to hear all about it!
Xo RA

Fashion Stories : What is an Investment Piece?

Fun fact: the name of this blog is kind of a joke. As in, my mom is an accountant and very number oriented. I. Am. not. And if you’ve done your research, you know that certain fashion items (looking at you Chanel and Hermes bags) actually INCREASE in value. Maybe I’m on to something?

But. Does that mean that every investment piece is a designer bag or a big deal? I don’t think so! For me, an investment piece is an outfit item (accessories too!) that you need in your life, that you use all the time, that adds value to your life. Maybe you’re into your workouts- you need great *non-see-through* leggings. A lot of them. Big wig in a corp job? Probably need suits. Go to a lot of events? You need party dresses.

I absolutely think that for everything you need it’s best to go for quality over quantity. But it’s not a needed thing to break the bank for every purchase. What do you need? What do you wear? What makes you happy? Let’s start there. And buy pieces that fit our lives- that are great quality.

By your definition, what is an investment piece? And what are you investing in?

Let’s chat about it!

I would really love to hear your thoughts and what you’re shopping right now!

xo RA

Shoulder Pad Power?

a woman in a leather bomber jacket and wide leg barrel jeans and camel heels

What’s your first reaction when we chat shoulder pads? Power Suits? The 1980s in general? Good? Bad? Politics? There are so many ways to think about, and use, shoulder pads (if you google you will be told the modern shoulder pad comes from the late 1800s when it was designed for football, but if we go back through history a version of shoulder pads have been with us since at least the 1400s) to make statements and outfits.

As someone who was a child in the 1980s (a YOUNG child), I have long associated shoulder pads with over the top outfits. And as I got older, and became a little self conscious about my body, I would cut them out of many a blazer and a dress to make myself look smaller. Irony? A great shoulder pad can actually help make your waist look smaller. The older I’ve gotten, the more in love I’ve fallen with fashion, and the more appreciation I have grown for fashion, my stance on my once hated shoulder pad has changed. I have come to actually love shoulder pads: the shapes that they can take, the way that they can shape us, and the political power we can weld in them.

a woman in a black velvet and chiffon dress with shoulder pads by a Christmas tree

For the purposes of this discussion, we need to agree on a few things:

-Usually, when we (as women) talk about flattering we are usually talking about clothes that make us look as if we are conforming to the current beauty standard. But flattering can also mean a pleasing outfit- and sometimes that means that the outfit itself makes a shape (that may not conform) or is interesting or in general takes up space. Yet, looking at dresses from the past and even power suits, the shapes are incredibly interesting- and again, ironically a wider shoulder with a nipped waist often makes you look smaller. Or conforms to the “usual beauty standard”. A long way to say that shoulder pads can be flattering even if they make our shoulders stand out a bit!

-By taking up space, changing the shape of our bodies, shoulder pads are inherently political. And with politics comes power. (This is where we agree that the idea of women taking up space is a form of power). If you go back to the first popular modern era of the shoulder pad (the 30s-40s), shoulder pads were not only used to shape the body in interesting and exaggerated ways, but as women entered more into the workforce in WWII the shoulder pad was used to make women a bit more masculine. The power suit of the 1980s? Part of the popularity is that the ’80s were when women were (perhaps more in mass) moving up the corporate ladder and shoulder pads were literally used to take up space. Make it seem as if women belonged in male dominated spaces and could dress the part. Fashion not only tells our stories, but it is a social language and at its very base, shoulder pads take up space- and that is political.

(SideNote: There is an interesting NYTimes article about the shoulder pads both candidates wore in the most recent US election, but I can’t find a free version of it– but you should google it!)

That being said, there are a ton of articles I read, knowing that I wanted to talk about shoulder pads, by people who are smarter than I on this topic that I think are worth a glance!

Wikipedia has a great timeline of shoulder pads in fashion with vintage examples to swoon over!

I love the Style Historian’s take on not only shoulder pads in vintage clothes but how to deal with them if you don’t love them :
Evolution of Shoulder Pads

This WSJ article does a bit of history and touches on the cyclic fashion nature of shoulder pads:
The Little Know History of Shoulder Pads- And Why They Keep Coming Back

And a look at some modern shoulder pads on current runways and editorials:
Oversized Shoulders

a woman in a leather bomber jacket and wide leg barrel jeans and camel heels

I am the first to admit that I used to hate shoulder pads (though- I truly thought that I would hate barrel jeans and I love them! And they have some of the “flattering issue”. Perhaps that issue is worth an in depth convo on its own). The weird thing about that? I have always loved 1930s/40s fashion- and when we look those periods are chock! full of shoulder pads (and exaggerated shapes!). As I age, I have become more open to them (maybe a bit more comfortable in my body) and don’t rush to cut them out of everything. Perhaps, it’s truly that I am more comfortable taking up space. Now, from vintage to modern, when I come across shoulder pads in my clothes I can’t help but think about what shape I’m making, how interesting that is, and how much space I am taking up- and what all that means.

What are your true feelings on shoulder pads? Love them? Hate them? Cut them out? How has your opinion on them changed?

I truly would love to hear any and all things about you and shoulder pads (and bonus if you have amazing 1980s pictures to show us!
XO RA