Category: Sunday Chronicles

I get attached to things, people, places. I am intensely loyal (once you earn my loyalty), I often give people more tries than they should get, I hang on longer than I sometimes should; it’s easy to see that letting go is hard for me. I have a sinking suspicion it is for a lot of us. I have no answers. I know that letting go is a process, it takes as long as it takes, and sometimes you just have to do it.

The above skirt is one of my favorites from Zara, it was one of their vegan leather ones. It went great with tee shirts, it was perfect for summer and heavy enough for fall. However, it was unable to be washed. You couldn’t use bleach on it, no dry cleaning. The one above is actually my third skirt. You see, it may not have been one of the things you could throw in the wash, but it could get stained easily. Color transfer from any number of sources could get on it, and they wouldn’t come off. Before, I was always able to buy a replacement skirt; this time when I noticed that my skirt can gotten stained, I couldn’t find another one online. And it was one of my faves. So I did all the things I could think of: hand wash, hand bleach, I used nail polish remover on it. But loves, nothing worked. Nothing. The hand wash and bleach didn’t make a dent, and while the nail polish remover did–it took the material with it and left a different stain behind. I worked on this skirt for days, but eventually I had to face the truth: I couldn’t save it, I had to let it go. And while it was just a skirt, letting it go wasn’t easy. Luckily, I was able to find a vintage leather skirt online that’s similar.

This isn’t the worst story about letting go, I know. And it has a happy ending (thankfully). I think there is no shame in being a person who holds on, but I think there are times when all of us have to let go. I wish for you that every time you have to let go of something , it has this kind of ending.

Wishing us all a week of peace and amazing shoes! XO RA

Loves, if you’ve been following my Instagram, especially my Instagram stories, you know that my family (mom/sister) and I went on a road trip for our family vacation this year. Road trips seem to be something completely American and nostalgic, and at the same time freeing and fresh. Our road trip? A little bit of both! There were small towns (yes, every town in TX has a football stadium, it’s the law), open spaces, dust, mountains, huge cities, and tiny villages that almost looked deserted. We sang along to the radio, laughed, fought only once, and saw a tiny bit of this country in a new way. Below you can see some of the amazing moments from our trip. I’d love to know: what’s the best thing about road trips for you?

XO RA

The great news for you? I packed some great outfits and made my mom play photographer! Be on the look out for pics taken on the road!

Wishing us all a week of freedom and amazing shoes! XO RA

Maybe you’re familiar with a certain kind of hangover? The one that comes from indulging a bit too much the night before? We all have a story about those kind, and most of us have a remedy (coconut water, a great spin class, and a burger); but those (thankfully) don’t last too long (warning: as you age, they can). Lately, another kind of hangover has been on my mind, the emotional kind. You know, where something “big” (good or bad) happens, and that emotion takes a while to get over. I’ve been thinking about them, and wondering: what’s our remedy for those?

Side note: I’m a big fan of being honest with where you are, I’m a big fan of taking your time through things, and I’m a big fan of therapy. I think that some things just take time and that there is absolutely no shame in that. If you’re going through something I think you have to be honest with yourself and those in your life; and that if you need a professional (even if it’s just to talk to) that is amazing!

What I’m interested in, and what I don’t always know how to deal with is when a big emotion just seems to linger. For me, this can happen a lot with trips. If I have a great vacation, or time in between all my cities, letting go of that experience can take a while. I can spend the next few weeks feeling low. In those instances planning fun nights out with friends, my next vacation, or having a “treat” can help. With big life events -break-ups, engagements, job changes, loss, gains–the emotional hangovers can last, and sometimes aren’t “cured” with fun plans.

Much like a “regular” hangover, you can at times see an emotional hangover coming, so I wonder: are there preparations you can take? Is there a way to brace for them like you do a physical one? In general, I think drinking a lot of water can help, but as I get older I’m not sure that there’s a way to prevent, or shorten an emotional hangover. Or, if there is, I think it might involve not feeling so much; something I’m not great at, and something that might dampen your enjoyment the first time. So what do we do?

I don’t know that I have the answers. Yes, this is one of those uncomfortable Sunday Chronicles when I have no answers, just a thing I’ve been thinking about that I’ve brought into our community. I think the way out of an emotional hangover may just be to let yourself feel whatever it is that your feeling, that if you can lean into the suck of that, that you can find a way through. Coconut water seems like an easier way!

I’d love to know: how do you deal with emotional hangovers? Do you have a rememdy?

Wishing us all a week of free emotion and amazing shoes! XO RA

There are studies after studies that prove that one way that we get pleasure out of experiences is planning them and looking forward to them! So, as we stare down the beginning of another season, I can’t help but plan out what I want to do this summer. Many bloggers give you their Summer Bucket List (I Love Cupcakes and Cashmere and Joy the Baker) and I hope that their lists and mine inspire you to have a great summer–even if that only means relaxing by the pool!

Without further ado, my Summer Bucket List:

Travel

I travel a lot in general (spending time in my two cities) and while I plan on being in both CA and TX this summer, there are other places on my mind! I have an annual family trip (this year we may go to CO), I’m hoping to get to see some friends in the Midwest, I want a lone adventure on the beach, and am hoping a few girl trips fall together (wine tasting, we’re looking at you).

Try New WorkOuts
I love my SoulCycle and Pilates, and have no plans to quit them, but I’m looking to add a little variety! I’m excited to try boxing, barre, ModelFit and more! The great thing about Summer is that there’s an easy energy–which lends itself to trying new things without the pressure, and I love that! I’m excited to play with my workouts and schedule!

Read all the Books
I love books and reading and live among stacks of books and magazines I want to read (as well as shoes). This summer I hope to get caught up on my stacks–and I’ll be sharing what I read!

Eat
Summer is a time for gazpacho, Rose’, and Popsicles by the pool. I plan to get my fill of all of it!

Exploring
In all the cities I’m in, I always feel like there are so many things to do, and I tend not to make it to everything I want to try! So this summer, I’m going to make it a point to do one of those events each week! From movies and yoga in the park to new restaurants and museums, I want to try it all. Got a recommendation for me? I’d love to hear it!

I know, this seems general (and some of it is, Summer is a state of mind!) but I’m excited to get to the planning of each thing (all while leaving room for lazy afternoons)! I’d love to know: what are you planning this summer?

Wishing us all a week of summer plans and amazing shoes! XO RA

This week is swim week and I have so many exciting swimsuits to show you, as well as the roll out of a new passion project for me: Fashion Gives Back. I love my clothes and shoes, but also feel like as world citizens it’s our job to make the world a better place. I’m thrilled to be showcasing and working with brands that do both!

Loves, I know that I talk about rest and sitting still a lot here in our weekly “fireside chats”. (See here) This is mainly because even though I’m an introvert (I am, I promise!) who loves her time alone, and a creative who needs to recharge after her bouts of creating, I have a hard time sitting still. Everything about it-from letting myself just do nothing, to active mediation, to admitting that I need some down time– has been a struggle for me to give into. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve gotten better about this as I’ve gotten older, I actively acknowledge that I’m a better person when I get some time each week to sit still, and now schedule it for myself, but that doesn’t always mean it’s easy.

And loves, May is my busiest month of the year. I have something each weekend, trips, birthdays (not only can I name someone for each day this month, both my mommy and I have birthdays this week!), graduations, and it’s the beginning of wedding season. It’s almost as if this is the month of go-go-go before summer sets in. So, when you know that you need some time to sit still and yet your calendar is completely full (and your to-do list because of said calendar is miles long), what do you do?

I’m learning. I’m learning that everything is a practice, from my yoga to my spin to my business to my sitting still. And this means that some days are amazing, and some days I fall out of the pose. That I have to schedule my time to sit still the same way I do my birthday celebration, and that even when it doesn’t come easy, that sitting still is still something to do.

And what do I do when I sit still? Meditate (or try to), relax, do nothing, read, recharge, Netflix and chill, look for inspiration, try to turn my mind off, try to turn inward, and most importantly, try to just be. Have I mentioned that it’s not always easy. That getting caught up in being busy and all I “have” to do is much easier? But, that when I do let myself sit still we’re all better for it.

I’d love to know: what’s your journey with sitting still? Tricks?

Wishing us all a week of stillness, birthdays, and amazing shoes! XO RA

From girlhood I have had a complicated relationship with my hair, haven’t we all? Like it or not, women (and girls) get fed messages about their hair that affect how we see ourselves. Don’t believe me? Look at any princess movie or any doll, long, beautiful hair rules. We have stereotypes about hair color. There are documentaries about “Good Hair” (if you haven’t seen this film by Chris Rock, I highly recommend it, it’s a whole other level of hair drama that I can’t speak to, but I want to acknowledge). It’s “statement” for a woman to chose to have short hair. Hair is often our first attempt to change who we are or how we’re seen, and as something we deal with on a daily basis, can accepting our hair be a form of self acceptance?

I am a natural blonde (yes, it did get darker as I got older, and I now enhance it), and my hair, left to it’s own devices can range from curly to wavy. I kept it long as a kid, it’s been thick, it’s now fine, but I have a lot of it. And loves, my hair and I have fought, it may be what I’ve cried over most. When I was 10, I grew my hair to my waist, my grandma was my nanny, she hated long hair-she offered me $100 to cut it. I did cut it, I hated it, and then my mom wouldn’t let me accept the money. This may have set the tone for a complicated relationship. I started experimenting with color in college, I’ve been super blonde, brown, red, and mousy. I spent years paying to have my hair chemically straightened, fighting my curl every step of the way.

But loves, these experiments weren’t always fun. I worried about being perfect-the perfect shade, the perfect cut, the perfect style. I wanted (and maybe still want) my hair to be its best self, look natural, and yet control everything about it. This may be a great metaphor for my life. Yes, I try to control my hair, and I can freak out about it. Ladies, I know there are some of you who can cut, color, style with an ease and grace that I envy. You seem not to worry about the shade or cut, and I long to be like you. For me, just accepting my hair and trying not to white knuckle a hair appointment has been a journey.

About three years ago I was at a breaking point. I had been attempting to find a colorist and my hair was in a bad state- it was blonde, but had orange, green, and brown in it (from bad dye). I needed a cut badly, my last keratin had grown out, and my ends were a wreck. I was lucky enough to find two women, Colleen and Sulekha, who changed my hair (and my life), and have helped me on the way to accepting my own hair.

Saying I was nervous to start this journey is a severe understatement. Colleen wanted to layer my hair (I had awful visions of 90s hair) and she had to talk me into it, the first time she let my hair go really wavy I almost had a heart attack, I had all these “rules” about length (it had to go into a bun, which to be fair I still stick to). I was jumpy and though she claims I’m not a bad client, I’m sure I drove Colleen crazy. It took some hand holding, some styling, but loves, I now love my wavy hair, and I’m so grateful that Colleen showed me how to embrace it. And loves, the cut was a cakewalk compared to color. Have I mentioned that there was green and orange in my hair? That I want the “perfect, natural” shade of blonde? My colorist, Sulehka, not only had to retone and color correct my hair, she’s had to deal with me being anxious about shades, learning that quality of light can make your hair “seem” different”, to really work to earn my trust. I’m lucky she stayed with me. We’re at a point now where I can sit down and let her do her thing, which lucky for me is a natural-like shade of blonde that’s made some boyfriends believe that I don’t dye my hair.

I’m at a point where I love my hair, I’m embracing having wavy,blonde hair that I don’t really fix. I love my Juxatipositon of messy hair and couture, my hair feels a part of me now. There are still times I freak out, I want to control length, I see the color in reddish light and will worry about color for days on end’ but I’m learning to relax. I’m learning that my hair can be exactly what it is, and that’s ok. And I’m learning that accepting a part of me is so much easier than fighting it. AND that great hair really does make your life better!

So, loves, what are your hair woes? Can you let it go or do you control it? What do you think it says about us?

Wishing us all a week of amazing hair and amazing shoes! XO RA

If you want to give my miracle workers a try: Colleen can be found @cleencuts on Instagram, and Sulehka is at Sally Hershberger LA. Tell them Rachel sent you!