Ex Files: The Shoes

Investment Piece: Ex Files

It’s that time of the month when I attempt to be Carrie Bradshaw, aka my own personal dating horror stories. If this speaks to you (or you just love the drama!) you can search ex files over in the search box for more, or may I suggest The BreakUp Text, Dudes and Nudes, The One Who Got Married. This month is a doozy- and sadly I didn’t break up with the dude over this (in my defense I was 23), but without further ado may I present The One Who Lied About a Party. Got Dating Horror Stories? I would love to hear them! Maybe we can even chat about you being featured! Xoxo RA

The Shoes

It should come as no surprise to anyone that I have a thing for shoes. And it’s not that I expect anyone I date to feel the way I do about shoes, or buy me any, but I do want my feelings and passions to be respected. So, when I started dating Ray I thought we might be a perfect fit. Not only did he seem to love that I love shoes, he would get excited about them with me. I had been saving for years-literally 2 years- to be able to afford Valentino Rockstuds. Ray and I didn’t live in the same city, and I thought (because of the love of shoes) that it would be fun for Ray to go with me to buy the Rockstuds.

I know, I know- but it was the first time I was really in a place to save up and buy myself something luxe I wanted. Rockstuds were such a staple, I thought getting them would announce that I was a “real” fashion woman. Even through everything, including this story, they still mean a lot to me, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get rid of them.

Ray was on board and we went to the Valentino store. I was so excited I was bouncing up and down like a 5yo on Christmas. This is where the story gets a bit sad. Instead of being supportive and happy for me, Ray began to cut me down a bit and put a damper on what, to me, was a big deal. I had wanted the kitten heel in the nude- Ray told me I was dumb not to get the higher heel as it was sexier. Did I mention I was like a kid on Christmas morning? Ray told me that I was embarrassing and I was acting “low class”. Did I mention that I had saved for 2 years to be able to afford these shoes? Ray told me that it was ridiculous for me to save for them and for shoes to matter to me. After I paid, he let me know that he should have bought them- I told him that he could buy me the higher heel. Ray told me that was gold digging and completely unattractive.

Buying these shoes meant something to me, and I wanted the purchase to be fun. Instead, I felt like nothing I did was right, I felt critized for being who I am, and I saw a side of Ray that I didn’t like. Needless to say, things with Ray didn’t work out. As I mentioned, I still have the shoes.

Perhaps today is a good day to put them on and remind myself that good shoes are worth it (and so am I!).