When I was little, I truly thought that day-to-night dressing was a huge (problem isn’t the right word–issue?) thing. Cosmo (and other magazines I read at friend’s houses) made me believe that every woman worked a fab job (because all the jobs written about sounded so exciting) and at 5 got out their make-up bags, made adjustments to their outfits in the bathroom, or in the back of cabs, and went out to somewhere elegant and fun.
(In unrelated news, I have found certain parts of adulthood to be disappointing)
Now, most of us are not in an office, and we aren’t racing somewhere, but, I’m still thinking about day-to-night. Or more precisely, I’m fascinated by how one outfit can become a million different things, all by changing the details.
(It may be a nice break, as usually when I’m in a set I love to talk about all the ways I break it up. And I have broken up this set! The pants go great with sweaters. The top and black jeans are chic! Getting dressed makes me feel like things are happening!)
In this case, it all changes by the belt!
The orginal belt came with the pants! Part of why I was attracted to this set was that I loved that it almost looked like a jumpsuit when tucked in. And the belt is great- pairing with with sneakers was my first instinct but anything from loafers to heels would look great here. The orginal belt pulls it all together, looks fantastic, would even look great with jeans.
So, why change the belt? You don’t have to. But adding a different one-this vintage gold one is one of my all time favorites-changes the outfit entirely.It’s such a statement. The gold belt elevated the look, even without heels, made me feel as if something elegant was about to happen.
For me, it’s the day to night difference.
Would other belts make completely different outfits and statements? Probably. Having an outfit that could be so many things with a simple change–how exciting is that? It makes me want to play with all the belts I have!
Some fit notes: this set is from Target and I love it! I’m in the extra-small for a top, and a size 2 in the pants- I have plenty of room in both. The faux leather is high quality! The gold belt is vintage, and I truly think that vintage belts are the way to go- so many options, and often great prices!
I’ve linked similar belts and this set below!
Xo RA
Note: this post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!
I’ve been thinking about how we’re all dressing during the Pandemic. And what we’re buying. There are days when I don’t get dressed- but I still have a ton of party dresses on my Wishlist. What is your pandemic waredrobe saying about you? I’m not 100% what I’m saying with mine, but I’m also not sure I’m done changing my mind about what to wear right now!
While going through magazines, I stumbled upon an article by Sally Singer in Departures Magazine (Linked here and copied below!) I loved her POV on our pandemic clothing choices, and the story her choices told. I hope that you love the article as much as I did. I would love to know: what is your pandemic wardrobe?
Xo RA
An Ode to One Style Expert’s Pandemic Wardrobe
A fashion veteran on why your personal style matters, no matter who sees it.
By Sally Singer on September 03, 2020
In the days before New York issued the stay-at-home order to combat COVID-19, I received my spring wardrobe in the mail. These were the few pieces that I had selected and paid for months prior with the idea that they would form the sartorial framework of my life for mid-2020 and beyond. I had high hopes for these items and for the adventures we would get up to together. Call it wacky, call it overdetermined, but I see fashion as both utilitarian and fantastical: something that gets me through the day while also providing a magic carpet ride.
I don’t think I am alone in this. We all make our style purchases with tender emotion and expectations, invest our frocks and jeans and T-shirts with a pocketful of dreams. The jacket that will seal the deal, the caftan for the perfect getaway. When you buy new running shoes, don’t you see yourself…running?
I had envisioned myself wearing this: a strapless taffeta dress from Molly Goddard with a billowy, tulip-shaped skirt; the most elegant white silk T-shirt and satin-and-horsehair skirt by Zanini, all massive proportions and luxurious fabrics; and a crisp raincoat, also by Zanini, cut full to give it slouch without schlump. I had imagined chic dinner dates in my Goddard, that perfect high strapless line so lovely for the table. The white ensemble was an ingenious solve for the Met Gala, the theme for 2020 being timelessness in fashion: What is more timeless than a white T-shirt, even one scaled to house Mother Ginger and all her charges? And the raincoat? That was for dashing to meetings in inclement weather, a vision of industrious glamour. The best laid plans. These items have hung in my closet ever since, loved (for sure) but unworn: no dinner dates, no Met Gala, no meetings that involve anything more than the kitchen table and solid Wi-Fi.
Instead my early pandemic wardrobe resembled a version of what I would imagine many of us wore while we stayed home, a little downbeat (faded jeans, sweatshirts), a touch sporty (track pants), a smidgen Zoom-worthy (crisp blue oxfords). I have heard that online sales were up for fabulous tops and jewelry, new essentials for FaceTime courting. Not for me that trend, but I admire the pure optimism and ingenuity that has created a new normal out of wearing, say, a Johanna Ortiz ruffled bustier up top and saggy boxers below. Bare feet, boy shorts, and fully beaded Saint Laurent? Why not? Online dating in the midst of a world health crisis is a hopeful business. Why not dress like a child’s match-it-or-clash- it card game?
By late spring my new normal involved a loose, high-water pant and a short- sleeved, button-front men’s shirt. I wore Tevas and metallic FitFlops, and sometimes paired my dorky sandals with tube socks to cover non-pedicured toes. It wasn’t obvious to me at first, but I came to realize that I was dressing exactly like my memories of my father, a man whose personal style had been cemented in the early 1960s and never wavered. I even took to wearing a T-shirt under my button- downs, a habit of his that had caused me such embarrassment in the 1970s when other “cool” dads were living loose, without visible underpinnings.
There is a tendency to think that when we “slob out,” when no one is watching or judging, there is little going on except comfort, convenience, necessity. Not so. All of our choices are meaningful, and I would argue that the ones we make in private bring us closer to ourselves. I did not consciously set out to dress like my dad, but in hindsight it makes perfect sense: I spent my childhood watching him steer our family through highly precarious times. His demeanor throughout was one of unfussy modesty, a person fiercely committed to humanity, and to disarmament, almost oblivious to vanity. Who better to guide me this summer?
And who or what informed your choices? If you spent months wearing only yoga pants and a funny T-shirt, ask yourself: Why those yoga pants? Why that T-shirt? Why and how did they comfort you, or calm your anxieties, through these extraordinary times?
As I write, New York is emerging from its tragic slumber. There can be meetings and dinners, if not (yet) charity balls. I don’t know exactly who I want to be in this moment, but I want to retain a bit of the person that emerged while I was away from the public eye. There aren’t going to be big evenings for some time, and probably not many large dinner parties to preside over either, so my many long dresses will need to be recycled, upcycled, or cycled out. As for the Goddard, I hope to debut it barefoot, in my apartment, cooking dinner for some-one special. It’s too precious and too bare to be seen first at lunch alfresco, except perhaps on the Amalfi Coast in a post-mask era. It demands romance. And as for the snowy Zanini ensemble? I hope that sometime soon I will be able to fly to London and once again walk through an exhibition at the Royal Academy of Arts, taking up lots of space in horsehair, satin, and silk—not the Met Gala, but special and glamorous nonetheless.
To all the things I’m wearing now, and all the outfits to come- I can’t wait to share them with you! Xo RA
What do you consider luxury? True luxury, worth every penny, makes you sigh luxury?
For me? There’s certain clothes and silk-silks and a perfect fitting heel come to mind. Deep,dark chocolates. The really good goat cheese. The first sip of fantastic champagne.
But what I’ve been thinking about lately are the luxuries that we can’t buy:
-Not having to set an alarm
-The comfortable silence you can have with someone you love
-A weekday afternoon off (I used to love going to a matinee and having those hours alone!)
-Alone Time
I’m sure that there are so many that aren’t coming to mind.
Why am I thinking about luxury? Because the longer we’re home, the more I crave it. Not just the things, but the experiences. The time with people I care about. And the more I want to wear luxury (I write this in yoga pants but I’m at the same time over yoga pants. Here’s hoping all my Juxatipositons are a luxury!)
I’ve been seeking out pieces like this to wear. Silk. Gold. But still lounge wear.
And I’ve been seeking out little luxuries I can give myself at home. Bubble baths. Fancy water.
It’s not the same. Sometimes it’s better, sometimes it’s worse. Luxuries don’t make everything better, but I think they are needed. There’s something about a little quiet, a little silk that makes the day easier to get through. And if we’re gonna get through the day, we may as well make it as luxurious as we can. Right?
I would love to know: what’s your definition of luxury? How are you giving it to yourself right now?
This dress is vintage, but I’ve linked similar options for your shopping pleasure below!
Xo RA
Note: this post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!
Do you plan out what you’re going to wear or do you fly by the seat of your pants and put together outfits on the day of?
I do a little of both, and I love these different methods for various reasons. When I plan out an outfit in advance, I love the anticipation of it- knowing when I’ll get to wear it, making it perfect before hand, and the playing that can come from tweaking an outfit before hand. Throwing something together the morning of, on the other hand, has led to some of my favorite go-to outfits, patterns I would not have thought to mix, and a sense of whimsy that is hard to plan. I try to do a little bit of each- plan ahead and fly by the seat of my pants each week.
In the before, I tried to do my schedule (everything from work to social to posts to workouts) the same way, balancing structure and being free. There were days that leaned more one way or another, but I strived to do both each week. I have no idea if it’s the holidays or the new year, but I’ve lately been struggling to get on a schedule, meaning I’m only flying by the seat of my pants. And it’s killing me.
There are days when I’m running so hard to get the things that HAVE to be done done that I can’t even set up, wrap my mind around, plan for the next day. I can do free time, and can wing a lot, but when last minute and winging it are my only “plans” it exhausts me. It’s not that I don’t know how to get out of this “by the seat of my pants” cycle I’ve gotten myself into- sit down, make a schedule, adjust it as I need, and stick to it. But when you’re deep in a cycle it can be hard to do that- and when I get exhausted I sometimes can’t see all the things. This week, in the middle of my (large) closet, I announced that I had nothing to wear — so that’s how I can get.
If I love freedom and the times that I can do it by the seat of my pants, how can it drain me so much? (And yes, when I go too far in other direction- too much structure– I can get the same exhaustion)
My answer is balance, and this week that is my goal. To make myself sit down and do a schedule (that includes some wing it moments). Get things on the calendar. Plan. Let myself think not just a day in advance, but days. And I’m going to trust that when I get myself on that schedule, that there will still be moments when I fly by the seat of my pants–but that it will return to fun kind of flying and not the panicked kind.
What are you working towards this week? How’s your schedule? Do you love flying by the seat of your pants?
I want to hear about all of it!
Wishing us all a week of plans and amazing shoes!
XO RA
We’re officially into the new year. (It’s almost scary that we’re almost in the second month!)
Maybe you’re all in on the new year, speeding ahead, getting things, done and it’s all great.
Or, maybe it’s been a lot, you still feel like you’re behind, and it’s still not feeling shiny and new for you.
And if you’re in the middle of those two things- join the club! This week felt like there was a shift in energy, I’m feeling hopeful about what’s to come, I’m excited about so much! And I’m still so tired. On Thursday I hit a wall, nothing was wrong, but I just didn’t have the energy to do anything. It didn’t help that it was grey outside, trying to rain but not succeeding. When I feel that low I do one of two things–let myself rest as I trust that my body is trying to tell me something, or I get way dressed up and trust that dressing like I’m full of energy will make me full of energy.
Option 2 didn’t work. Tired, achy, just out of it- an outfit couldn’t fix it. (Though long term I do believe in fashion!) When I hear the term “new day” I always think of change and big things. The doing of things. The start of things.
Maybe yesterday was a day of rest. But today? It’s a new day. I promised myself that if I let myself rest yesterday, today I would start. Do the things. Wear all the outfits. Get going. Let it all be new and shiny. (I’ll be sharing all of it with you!)
These pictures are from a few January’s ago. There’s something about the ocean that makes me feel calm and grounded, and also makes me believe in the future. It’s my happy place. Polka dots also make me happy-classic but modern, and very hopeful. I’m excited for all the new things to come. I’m grateful for this new day. Now, to go get dressed in it!
How is your new year going? How are you feeling? What are you wearing?
Xo RA
This set is vintage but I’ve linked polka dots I love below!
Note: this post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!
Usually, around this time, we would be talking about cleaning out our closets. I would pull out all my things and go through them, weed out what no longer serves me, and either give it away or sell it.
I detail my process here and here. I write a lot about cleaning out your closet- not because I love it- but because I think it’s a more complicated than just getting rid of things. Search closet in the search bar!
Honestly? This year I have no emotional bandwidth to clean out my closet. I haven’t since the pandemic started. It’s not that I can’t identify clothes that aren’t fitting my life, in some cases me, or that may need to be let go of. But I am in no way ready or able to deal with all of that. Because I don’t know how long all of this will last. Because I know that I don’t make great choices when I’m super emotional, and I know that right now going through my closet would be emotional.
So, if you’re in the same spot- it’s ok. There’s no deadline on cleaning out. There’s no mandate that you have to do it. Now may not be the time to clean out your closet. For me it isn’t. And that’s aok!
While I’m not cleaning out my closet, what very much sounds good to me is closet organization. I want to know where all my things (treasures) are. I want that space to be efficient and help me get dressed easily.
How am I going about that? Almost the same way that I clean out! I’m dividing my clothes into sections (for me it’s vintage (both day and dressy)/dresses/tops/pants/skirts/bags/shoes- and it grows from there. I’m looking at turning a room into a closet- with all the shelves and more that I need. There’s an accounting of what I need (space) and what serves me (being able to see all my things), and see what works.
I’m not showing you now, as this is a work in progress, and to be very honest I’m not 100% sure what it’s looking like. But I know getting my ducks (shoes) in a row will help me feel better.
What about you? Are you cleaning out? Organizing? A combination of the two? How’s it going? What are you learning? Tell me everything!
I’m linking closet organization systems below that I’m thinking of using in my own closet!
Xo RA
Note: this post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!
Perhaps this 3 day weekend has been a bit more subdued (there’s nothing wrong with subdued!), but while we’re here we might as well shop! Below are my faves from sales here and there!
Note: this post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!
Everything is 15% off at H&M. My top picks? Sweater vest and the black/white set!
Shop my picks here<\a>
Get 40% off all tops at Anthropologie! I love the different takes on a chambray top and button-downs with patterns. Shop my picks here
Get up to 80% off at Moda Operandi. My faves? That vegan leather jumpsuit is under $200, and I’ve been thisclose to buying the snake skin boots since Sat!
Shop them here
Everything is 25% at Frame Denim! Did you love the jeans in this post? Now you can get them at a discount!
Shop all my picks here
Get up to 30% off (and free shipping) at Carbon38! I love the white leggings with gold snake print, and their lounge sets are divine!
Shop it all:
I had to include a shoe sale! Get an extra 20% off sale at Sam Edelman with code BESTOFSALE. It’s no surprise that I love all the boots, and also the square toed pumps!
Shop all my picks here
What are you buying? I’m trying to stick to a budget, but please act surprised when you see outfits posts made of some of the picks here!
We’ve made it to the first long weekend of the year!
(I, too, am waiting on my prize for that!)
There are so many options –
A. Take the weekend and rest. Burrow down (my cat is good at that) and just let things pass.
B. Go wild (within constrictions of the panny, etc)
C. Call it a clean slate.
I’m choosing C (with a side of A). This year, I’ve been easing – slowly. Calmly. I know what I want to do, but have yet to really think it through, write out my goals, or anything that signifies a clean slate. Have I been working towards goals? Of course. Changing things? You bet. But it’s felt “unofficial”.
So. This weekend I’m taking the time. To make my lists. To clean things. To set myself up. To wipe the slate clean.
I know, I know. The new year was technically over a week ago. But who says that we can’t start over at any time? Why not use the time we have to restart?
It doesn’t have to be over the top. Big. Bold.
But I’m taking this time to really start over.
Think about what I want and how to get there
Start new habits. Break old ones.
Make things fresh- from my outfits on down.
Lists. Goals. All the things.
Write them down and get them going.
(And yes. Spending some time in bed with a good book and trying to get rid of these allergies!)
Does it matter if it’s the first or the 15th? I don’t think so (every moment is a new chance and all that). And who’s to say that easing in doesn’t make the lists and goals and habits even better?
I’ll let you know how it goes 😉
I would love to know- how are you spending this weekend?
Wishing us all a clean week and amazing shoes!
XO RA
What a wild, wild week. We started with snow and I felt like everything was gonna be ok. Then the week happened- and while it was not bad, it was a lot. I shoot some looks, but ended up not being happy with most of the pictures we got, or the outfits, or anything. Which left me panicked.
That suddenly, I wasn’t good at outfits or my job. A jolt when fashion is something I love and like to think I’m good at. But,you know when you get a little panicked it can lead to a big panicked? Yes. That was me. I know that my panicky feelings were an overreaction.
(At least that’s what I’m telling myself. It was one group of pictures! And there’s so much going on right now, I know that my panic could be about so many things.)
But, sometimes panic doesn’t listen to reason (or fashion).
So, what do we do when we’re panicked?
Some general panicked advice? Breathe (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4). An acting coach once taught us to look around the room and name things by their color instead of their name (i.e. If you see a clock you don’t say clock you say silver -or whatever color it is. This makes your brain focus and work different patterns and it calms you. I use it in auditions or crazy presentations- it helps!). There’s a tapping method that’s supposed to calm your nervous system.
I’ve also been known to panic shop, and while no expert will tell you this, I think it can help in certain circumstances.
Panic is a funny thing. I was so upset–and then. I wasn’t. Yes, in the meantime I made some tea and shut everything off and watched a comfort show (Schitt’s Creek). Maybe the acts or the time, but when I looked back at the pictures (yes, these are some of them), while they aren’t my FAVES (and I can name you a million things that I wanted to be different), they aren’t the WORST either.
Isn’t it weird what panic can make you think?
There’s a lot going on. And not all panic is bad- in danger it can give you strength, etc. Maybe the trick is learning to use our panic, and knowing when it’s lying to us, and then knowing how to get rid of it.
I love this collared sweater- and while perhaps different bottoms would have been a better choice, this shoot taught me some things about my camera and me. And now that the panic is gone, I can snuggle down!
I hope that this week you were kind to yourself. And loving. And if/when you were panicked you were able to find calm.
Xo RA
I’ve linked similar pieces and these jeans below! Note: this post does contain affiliate links. While that does not affect the price for you, I may earn commission from them. Thank you for your support!
Usually, by this time, I have a set of goals. Not just personal or business, but for what to wear throughout the year. This year? I’m behind- which is either scary or exciting as I could be anyone and wear anything! What I have been doing is thinking about how I want to dress and what I want to dress for. I’m focusing on the words Power, Purpose, Self-Care, and Gratitude. How can we dress that way? Let’s chat!
